Several years ago we had a bird named "Cranky", who never failed to live up to his name. He would always fight against us doing anything with him and only appreciated the fact that we fed him. However, he showed a particularity about eating. He would screech and cry for his seed and then when it was placed in front of him he would walk right through it. Cranky would take a couple of bites as he walked through the pile. Upon reaching the other side of the seed he would continue walking - looking for food - rather than turning around and continuing to eat the seed!
Now you might be thinking actions like this warranted a name more like "Stupid". Nevertheless, we always got a kick out of how dumb it is for this bird to walk right away from the thing that he most valued - only to search for it!
Yep, there is a moral to this story - Yesterday I realized that I was doing the same thing as this dumb bird. (ouch!)
I was feeling down about the lack of things I have accomplished compared to others. I know guys younger than me that already are deep into ministry. I also, know guys younger than me, making 12x as much money as I am. Now, I am not as concerned about people making more than me. After all, my goal in life is to glorify God - not collect paper our government isn't even backing. However, the fact that people are passing me in worldly success - and in the work of the kingdom - isn't very encouraging. I kind of feel like I am failing both sides.
But then I thought of Cranky, and how he walked away from the food that gave him life. I realized that I should expect my life to feel futile because I too have walked away from the bread of life. I don't spend the time I used to in God's word - some how convinced that after I get everything taken care of I will have time for more of God's "stuff".
I read the bible everyday - but I don't study it like I used too. I don't spend time searching it anymore because I believe myself "too busy". Because of this I am paying the price. How can I share with others what I myself don't know? How can offer sustenance to others - when I don't partake of it myself? Why in the world am I thinking I can do anything apart from Christ? I now realize that you can't walk away from God's directions - and expect to build anything. I need to start with Christ and everything else will fall into place. Time for some quite time with God.
You know, I'm starting to like that dumb bird...
Feedback and Comments
I have studied as long as I can remember...accumulating knowledge and getting acknowledged for the depth of knowledge in my field. In just one day all that I worked for was shattered. The degree that I worked for 4 long years I did not receive for something that was not my fault. Why only me? Is this what victory looks like? Indeed it was. I was broken of my pride....humbled....crushed to the place where I could say truly with Paul...."But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ I may not be looked up by those at my field, but now as I am being broken, Scripture tells me that He takes great pleasure in my brokeness. By brokeness I mean...yielded spirit. Seek Him bro. Rob and you hunger for Him, and I have spent much time praying for both of you, though more for Rob because I spend more time with him. Sid